Two different people kind of slammed me for my facebook posts. One person asked me to "stop poluting my wall." But I didn't recognize this man. It must have been an accidental posting because he's not on my list. Another complaint was similar in nature.
I truly feel bad about this. I realize I only have a couple genuine friends on facebook, but holy rumoli, if I don't shake people up with the news of suffering fetuses, than who will? Call me the villain. Call me the witch. I really don't care because maybe to some I am the bad guy when all I am doing is thinking about the fetus. I'm giving education, sometimes pictures, true facts and unbridled honesty in the face of a terrible Canadian problem. Why would I be like this? Read on.
First, if you want to slam me, I can only assume I've hit a note. I am certainly not speaking to good, clean parents but it is inescapably possible that occasionally a blog reader may know the trouble of a particular FASD child and don't need my blogs' advice. And then it is also possible that people are afraid of an FASD outcome in their own real pregnancy - a baby not far off (Did I drink too much?). Finally, it's entirely possible that the readers who are slamming me, (only 2 so far out of 100+), have a direct link to a real FAS case and it's truly difficult to have to read my warnings and truths after what they've already witnessed in an FASD child's life. Can't say I blame them but...
...what else can I do? I am reaching out to the people who don't know. But mostly and foremostly, I am reaching out to the government to keep this sometimes ugly, (not forgetting the precious), information in their heads and hopefully, one day, one bright sun-shiny day for the fetus, some real talk in the House of Commons will come about. Canada is a leader in many areas. Best multi-cultural country, two best cities for architecture, Vancouver - best city in the world to live. There's more. But it depends who's doing the counting, doesn't it?
Well count me in for FASD. If you wish, blame me 'till hell freezes over. I don't know why you would do that but I'm not stopping. I'm speaking for the fetus. I'm speaking on the issue and like a true fighter and comrad, I am also speaking on behalf of my own drinking legacy. Go ahead and knock me down for having ARND. My family sure did.
My whole family hurt me. I was different from the beginning. I was a "bad kid" apparently. (Now my family are dead except for my sister who received all the money, the land, the house, leaving me with nothing.) Because I was different.
It was really cool how, after stripping me of my first parents, the government sloughed me into an abusive home where my mother soaped and peppered my mouth regularly, pulled me around by my curly hair regularly, sent me to bed without supper until school the next morning, somewhat regularly, threatened to send me back to the adoption place many times (pretty darn scary for a small kid), kicked, slapped and degraded me, before finally turning me into a self cutter. Now that's some pretty serious sh--.
The only thing I didn't get from my mom, and dad, for that matter, were the words, "I love you." My dad, however, one evening admitted, after I flunked most of grade 9, "I wish I could have loved you more." I was 13 years old. Mom would never have had the guts to say something like that.
And then when I receive a couple of complaints about a picture of truth - the face of FASD - I say, "Well, tisk, tisk." Guess it's too much for some, I know, but is it too much for the word to be spread out? THINK, you slammers. Have some couth. There is no polution coming from me. Unfriend me if you want. Ignore the problem. One of your family could have symptoms and you don't even know it. Wouldn't it be better to be educated? ARND (Alcohol Related Neurodevelopmental Disoreder) is the most invisible and also the most common. Doctors and therapists are needed to confirm its existence. It is often confused with other disorders that seem to mimick it. But believe me, it is different, and if caught early, there are ways to help.
I try to imagine if I had recieved something on my wall, like say, breast cancer info, photos, or whatever, day after day. I would never call that polution. If I didn't want it I would discretely say so. But I don't mind Breast Cancer posts or any other major problem group looking to educate and get people to be pro-active. It is something that must continue to be put in front of faces lest they forget. So how far out in left field am I? What am I really doing wrong? Greenpeace is everywhere. I want to be everywhere (in my own style of course).
In a survey I did in 2009, about 90% didn't know what FASD was. This is the year 2011 and I'm a bit scared. I'm on disability. I'm really not that far from living in the street, losing my computer, my only life with my cats and FASD prevention. My life is FASD PREVENTION. So take the issue, not me. It's not about me. You can use my advice as gathered from years of reading and experience and then kick me in the shins. Puke on my shoes if it helps! Step on my blue suede shoes and throw me off a building if it makes you feel better. Say what you want; do what you want, and I'll still continue. Nobody in the world can stop me. Not the police, not the government.
Now that I've said what I always want to say with my infliction, as above, at least listen and try to understand. We need policies and control from the men and women who can make change for our youngsters. It begins when the first pregnancy test reads positive and it ends when congress tables the FASD problem for our great country. Let's turn that around. Start tabling today and less women will discover pregnancy before three months of drinking with her beer gut husband or her sophisticated baron of finance with plenty of money to sneak in the best of the best of alcohol. Either way, I am positive there will be a talk one day insisting that our country breed only intellectual, fully capable children. Again, I relate to Jack Layton who had a monetary plan for intellectual kids. A kid with FASD has but a tiny share in the "intelligence industry." Could we not try to repair that? I'm trying. I am trying. And here is the "why?"
It's because our number one birth defect in Canada is 100% preventable. It's not like other syndromes. No matter how puzzling the other syndromes may be regarding lineage, incidental cause or otherwise, this one - FASD - is 100% preventable. Do you know how upsetting it is for me to know that so many, many kids will have the same life as I?
In one Scandinavian country, (won't name), it is automatic jail time for merely hitting or slapping a child. I'm not asking for that. But an incredible amount of newborns "literally poop proof" when they are born, that mom was drinking during pregnancy, even as far back as 4 months before birth. A woman cannot hide her habit when pregnant anymore. There are no undetected slaps. Can't hide it.
When the fetus speaks, are you really listening? I sure hope you all are. For the truest of my audiences, the problem pregnant ones, take heed. Take antabuse. Take a giant leap for detox and search for the child you will one day be proud of 9 short, healthy months later. No child should end up like I did. No child. And I am not the worst case scenario.
From experience:
Just call me Anthony (Birthname). Tony is fine.
Call me what you like, but don't really throw me of a building. I'm an innocent victim. There will be thousands of me born this year. Think about that please, and consider what you might do in my position if you could.
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